Power Rankings of Kids in a College Classroom

Posted: February 10, 2012 in Dan Price White

 

 

 

 

 

 

It’s been five years now since I was doing my thing around Louisville’s campus but I haven’t forgotten the joys of attending class. Sure there were frat parties, working out, playing ball, eating Subway three times a day and late-night hangouts in the dorms, but it was the classroom where you got to see fellow students at their best.

So without further ado, here is Price Is White’s “Kids in a College Classroom” Power Rankings.

 

1.      The Hot Girl

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

No college classroom was complete without that one girl who was a nine or better and you had no idea where she came from, where she went after class or why she wasn’t making a trillion dollars modeling.

When group work was assigned you always tried to hover in her area because you knew if you had a male professor that you were getting no worse than a B+.

You also kind of sat back on days she was presenting something to the class thinking about how if you are ever up against her at a job interview that you are totally screwed.

2.      The Older Person

 

 

 

 

 

 

There is no one more confusing to college-aged kids than the “older student”. Either a housewife finally ready to go back and finish that degree, someone laid off and looking for a new career or just someone who is bored and want to go to class every day and ask a million questions.

These people have time to kill and kids in college do not. There’s likely a game to attend that night, a social gathering, or possible a part-time job to help pay tuition.

But not the older student, they have questions for days for the professor, so you might as well sit back and enjoy this weird generation gap on a campus.

3.      Question/Comment Guy

 

 

 

 

 

 

Somewhat akin to the older person, question/comment guy obviously doesn’t have a lot going on later either. Don’t get me wrong, if you go to college you should be engaged and ask when confused, but don’t get to the point where you are having a 30 min. one-on-one convo with the teacher.

I had these two classmates in all of my Sports Administration classes at Louisville that just took over the classes with crazy opinions and comments. It was like they were on First and 10 doing a Skip Bayless impersonation with Stephen A. Smith. Getting all heated on marketing strategies and techniques for department fundraising.

4.      Mysterious Foreign Guy

 

 

 

 

 

 

The foreign guy isn’t going to sit in the front of the classroom and isn’t going to ask hard any questions, but I guarantee he is the smartest kid in the class and is making more money than you at an awesome job right now.

It’s a pretty big leap to leave China or Russia and come get a degree from an American institution, so when these guys get here there is no messing around.

When you are out at the Foam Party, they will be in the library. When you are playing Madden in your dorm until 3 a.m., they are waking up to an internship at the museum downtown. Repect mysterious foreign guy and learn all you can from him.

Also a smart choice for any group work.

5.      Average Joe/Sometimes Asleep Guy

 

 

 

 

 

Ahh, the All-American college student. Sitting in about the middle row of the room, probably not taking notes and many times catching up on sleep. This is what I saw the most of in college.

Maybe he went to school because he had no better options or mom and dad forced him there, but I can guarantee he is not learning a thing.

This guy needs to straighten his act up quick or he will be about as employable as a marble. No doubt this is the guy who goes hard for the group work with the hot girl and will almost undoubtedly ask Mysterious Foreign Guy to borrow his notes around test time.

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